Starbucks Karma…

So I walk into Starbucks this morning to order my usual  fuel. What struck me was the higher than normal amount of people sitting around acting productive on their internet devices of choice. It’s a typical day at my favorite coffee house.

Here’s a company that has probably spent billions creating a social atmosphere to compliment the caffeine buzz they provide and nobody f*cking talks. You have some cool Jazz album playing over a nice sound system. Warm colors, nice seating and typically a very friendly staff. Yet, instead of people shooting the breeze with each other or the Baristas, everybody avoids social interaction and buries their faces into their devices. Most don’t even have the decency to thank the person who just made their drink. While you can’t discount what technology has done for us in the past decade you also can’t ignore what it’s taken away.

As I’m waiting for my drink I strike up a Bruins convo with familiar face behind the bar. While we chat I’m looking over the flophouse that’s supposed to resemble a seating area. There’s book bags, briefs and even a few coats lying on the floor. I look at my buddy and ask what it’s like to work in a convalescent home for zombies. He laughs, puts my drink on the bar and shakes my hand wishing me a good new year. As I’m walking out I notice a brand new iPhone 5 literally laying on the floor and plugged into a charger. Knowing this is an expensive piece I try to be a good doobie and ask if anyone had lost or forgot their phone. When I get no response I pipe up a second time with a patented Irish whisper. Finally some hipster halfway across the store who seemed pissed I dragged him out of his Pinterest induced coma lays claim to the phone. I reply “dude you might want to get this off the floor before it disappears or someone steps on it”. He gives me the “yeah whatever dude I’m too cool for that” face and says “it’s fine”.

Now 10 years ago I would have said something wise back after being shrugged off for trying to be nice. But I’m a more mature Dot Rat these days, I bite down and head for the exit. As I’m three feet from the door my ears where blessed with the the most wonderful sound one could wish for at that very moment.


That’s right, a fellow zombie stomped his brand new iPhone while playing on none other than…..wait for it… iPhone. Before anything could be said between the stomper and the hipster I made sure to lock eyes with my new friend so he could see the satisfaction on my face….then I let it fly …. “Mazal Tov!!!!”

I hate to say it….but it made my day.




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